The Invisible Work of the Holidays

As the holiday season approaches, many of us are gearing up to create meaningful experiences for our families and loved ones. But beneath the surface of the festivities lies a heavy mental load—work that often goes unseen and unacknowledged.

From planning road trips to organizing gifts, these tasks require endless mental juggling:

• Anticipating everyone’s needs.

• Managing schedules and emotions.

• Coordinating meals, gifts, and holiday traditions.

• Navigating last-minute changes or unexpected challenges.

This invisible labor is what keeps the holidays running smoothly, but it often falls disproportionately on one person. And if that person is you, it’s time to take a step back and ask: Do I have to carry all of this alone?

Recognizing Hidden Holiday Roles

Whether you’re the family’s Chief Travel Officer, Gift Logistics Manager, or Holiday Meal Planner, these roles take significant time and effort. The problem? They’re often taken for granted, leaving the person carrying them feeling unseen and overwhelmed.

Naming these roles is the first step toward recognizing the work you’re doing. It’s not “just planning a trip” or “simply buying gifts.” It’s a full-time job of organizing, anticipating, and executing—while also keeping everyone else happy.

Sharing the Load with Fair Play

The Fair Play Method offers a practical way to share responsibilities. It’s not just about delegating tasks; it’s about dividing them fully—so whoever takes on a job owns it from start to finish.

Here’s how you can apply it this holiday season:

1. Name the Hidden Work: Sit down and list out all the responsibilities you’re managing—both big and small.

2. Divide Tasks Fairly: Assign tasks based on the Fair Play principle of Conception, Planning, and Execution (CPE). For example, instead of just asking someone to “wrap gifts,” delegate the entire process of deciding on gifts, purchasing them, and wrapping them.

3. Let Go of Perfection: Sharing the load means accepting that things might not look exactly how you would do them—and that’s okay.

Focus on What Truly Matters

It’s easy to get caught up in making the holidays “perfect,” but perfection comes at a cost. Instead of doing it all, consider what truly matters to you and your family. Maybe it’s more time spent together, less stress, or simply creating space to enjoy the moment.

The holidays don’t have to rest entirely on your shoulders. Sharing the load not only lightens your burden but allows others to step up and take part in the work that makes the season meaningful.

What’s Your Hidden Holiday Job Title?

This year, take a moment to reflect on the invisible roles you’re carrying. Are you the Chief Travel Officer, Gift Logistics Manager, or Holiday Memory Maker? Whatever your hidden job title, it’s valid, important, and worth sharing.

Let’s start a conversation about how we can share the load this holiday season. What’s your hidden job title? How do you plan to divide responsibilities this year?

Together, we can create a holiday season that feels more manageable—and more enjoyable—for everyone.