What Kids’ Shows Teach About Fair Play and the Mental Load
With the upcoming holiday break and potentially more time at home with kids, I know my own kids’ screen time tends to creep up. Screen time is always a hot topic, but that's not what I’m here to discuss in this blog. If you’re looking for research on screen time, I recommend checking out Emily Oster (@profemilyoster) or Cara Goodwin (@parentingtranslator) for thoughtful and evidence-based insights.
For those navigating the world of kids’ media, I also can’t recommend Common Sense Media enough. It provides comprehensive reviews, ratings, and advice for parents and educators on media and technology, helping you make informed decisions about what your kids are watching.
That said, if you’re a no-screen-time family, this post might not be for you. However, if your kids do watch TV, and you want to ensure they’re consuming high-quality, thought-provoking content, this post is for you. As a Fair Play Method facilitator, I see kids’ shows as a unique opportunity to highlight themes of teamwork, fairness, and the division of labor—concepts central to the Fair Play Method. Let’s explore how popular kids’ shows can help families tackle the mental load and create more equity at home.
What Kids’ Shows Reveal About Gender Stereotypes, Division of Labor, and Mental Load
In many kids’ shows, traditional gender roles are still front and center: the mom as the planner and emotional anchor, while the dad is often the fun-loving sidekick. These portrayals mirror the real-world imbalance of the mental load—the Conception, Planning, and Execution (CPE) of family tasks—often carried by moms. Studies show that women shoulder 65% of the household’s mental load, including remembering appointments, organizing activities, and managing the emotional needs of the family, even when both partners work outside the home. This imbalance is reflected in the media and underscores the importance of challenging stereotypes and redistributing responsibilities at home.
However, some shows are challenging these norms. On top of the list - BLUEY! My family is definitely part of the Bluey fan club - in fact the song, I Know a Place (The Creek Song) by Bluey, Helena Czajka and Jazz D’Arcy was my top song this year according to my Spotify Wrapped. Admit it, it’s an absolute banger! (Speaking of Spotify, check out my recent post on Instagram titled Motherhood Unwrapped where I unwrap the reality of modern motherhood).
Ok back to Bluey….
Bluey showcases Bandit, the dad, as an active and engaged parent, while still highlighting the invisible work Chilli, the mom, carries. Shows like Bluey provide an excellent opportunity to discuss Fair Play principles, such as the importance of defining roles, sharing the mental load, and ensuring each family member takes ownership of their contributions.
Other shows helping highlight these important topics include Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood, Sesame Street, Molly of Denali, Doc McStuffins, Puffin Rock, Xavier Riddle and the Secret Museum - to name a few.
Episodes Deep Dive
Let’s dive into a few standout episodes that can serve as conversation starters for implementing Fair Play in your home.
(Quick note - this is by no means an exhaustive list. Simply some good episodes to help get the conversation started.
Bluey (Disney+)
The Pool (Season 1, Episode 8)
In this episode, Bandit takes the kids to the pool but forgets essentials like sunscreen and towels. Chilli arrives prepared, showcasing the invisible work she does to ensure the family is cared for. Bandit learns that teamwork and preparation are key to successful family outings.
Fair Play Connection: This is a great example of how the mental load often goes unrecognized. Use this episode to discuss the CPE of tasks like outings, and consider redistributing these responsibilities more equitably in your household.
Baby Race (Season 2, Episode 50)
Chilli reflects on her early days as a mom, grappling with societal pressures and self-doubt about meeting milestones. She learns to embrace her unique journey and the importance of support from other moms. I love how this episode highlights the importance of leaning on your village for support and encouragement. Bella, reassuring Chilli by saying, "You're doing great." gets me EVERY TIME!
Fair Play Connection: This episode highlights the emotional labor of caregiving and the need for community. Fair Play encourages us to acknowledge and support one another’s efforts, reminding parents that no one has to carry the load alone.
Promises (Season 3, Episode 12)
When Bandit forgets to take out the garbage, it sparks a family discussion about accountability. The episode emphasizes the importance of keeping commitments and working together to maintain harmony.
Fair Play Connection: This is a great moment to introduce the concept of task ownership. In Fair Play, when someone takes on a task, they own it fully, from conception to execution.
Action Steps for Families:
Practice Preparation Together (The Pool): Before your next family outing, involve everyone in planning. Make a checklist as a family, so everyone contributes to ensuring nothing is forgotten.
Reflect on Emotional Labor (Baby Race): Share stories about your parenting journey with your kids, highlighting challenges and milestones. This fosters empathy and understanding about the unseen efforts parents make.
Keep Promises Visible (Promises): Create a family “promise board” where commitments are written down. This helps everyone stay accountable and reinforces the importance of following through.
Teach Problem-Solving (Markets): Watch Bluey’s "Markets" and encourage your kids to brainstorm solutions for small family tasks. This builds responsibility and teamwork in a fun way.
Daniel Tiger’s NeighborhooD (pbs kids)
Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood continues the legacy of Fred Rogers, a pioneer in teaching empathy and social-emotional learning to children. The show helps young children understand family dynamics, teamwork, and responsibility through relatable, age-appropriate lessons. By emphasizing empathy—one of Fred Rogers' core teachings—it highlights how tasks and responsibilities affect everyone in the family. Through its modeling of fairness and collaboration, Daniel Tiger provides an accessible way to discuss sharing labor equitably, fostering a spirit of teamwork and support.
Daniel Helps Take Care of Margaret (Season 6, Episode 14)
Daniel helps his mom by taking on small tasks for his baby sister, Margaret. This is a gentle introduction to the idea that even small contributions are part of supporting the family.
Neighborhood Jobs (Season 1, Episode 40): When X the Owl falls ill, Mom Tiger and Daniel step in to manage the neighborhood library. This episode highlights the significance of community members sharing responsibilities and supporting one another, emphasizing collaborative efforts in maintaining communal spaces
Fair Play Connection
Episodes like Daniel Thinks of Others and Neighborhood Jobs show the value of noticing needs and sharing responsibilities, aligning with Fair Play principles of fairness and teamwork.
Action Steps for Families:
List Tasks: Create a family task list together.
Assign Roles: Use the shows to discuss ownership of responsibilities and assign age-appropriate tasks.
Celebrate Efforts: Acknowledge everyone’s contributions to foster teamwork.
Practice Empathy: Talk about how helping each other makes the family stronger.
Peppa Pig (nick jr.)
Peppa Pig offers a humorous but insightful lens into family dynamics, often reflecting traditional gender roles and the division of labor within households. While the show is playful, it subtly portrays the mental load carried by Mummy Pig, who often juggles work, childcare, and household tasks. Meanwhile, Daddy Pig is frequently depicted as the well-meaning but less organized parent, reinforcing the imbalance seen in many real-life families. These narratives provide an opportunity to discuss how gender roles and mental load impact family life and to model more equitable solutions.
Spring Cleaning (Season 3, Episode 7)
The Pig family works together to clean the house, making a big task manageable by sharing the load.
Fair Play Connection: This episode demonstrates the importance of collaboration and dividing responsibilities to keep the household running smoothly—a key principle of the Fair Play Method.
Mummy Pig at Work (Season 1, Episode 7)
Mummy Pig juggles working from home while Peppa and George constantly interrupt her. Meanwhile, Daddy Pig doesn’t face the same challenges.
Fair Play Connection: This episode highlights the imbalance many moms face in juggling paid work and caregiving. Fair Play can help address this by ensuring caregiving responsibilities are shared equitably, freeing up mental space for both parents.
Daddy Puts Up a Picture (Season 2, Episode 4)
Daddy Pig tackles the task of hanging a picture, with the family pitching in to help.
These episodes reflect Fair Play principles by showing how shared effort lightens the load and how imbalances—like constant interruptions—can impact productivity and well-being.
Action Steps for Families:
Team Up: After watching Spring Cleaning, assign household chores to each family member and work together to complete them.
Discuss Boundaries: Use Mummy Pig at Work to talk about respecting work time and creating boundaries for parents working at home.
Recognize Efforts: Celebrate everyone’s contributions, no matter how small, to encourage shared ownership of family tasks.
Create Fair Play Rules: Identify areas where responsibilities feel uneven and redistribute tasks to promote fairness.
Using Kids’ Shows as Conversation Starters
Kids’ shows can be powerful tools for sparking family conversations about shared responsibilities. Next time your family is watching, try asking questions like:
“Who do you think does the most work in this show?”
“How do the characters divide tasks? Is it fair?”
“What could the other characters do to help out?”
These questions can help kids develop an awareness of fairness and teamwork, laying the foundation for shared responsibilities at home.
Closing Thought
As a Fair Play Method facilitator, I’m always looking for creative ways to spark conversations about balance, fairness, and the mental load in families. Kids’ shows offer a unique lens through which we can reflect on our own dynamics and make intentional changes.
What’s your favorite kids’ show or episode? Share it in the comments, and let’s talk about how we can use screen time to empower and connect with our families!
Resources and References
Common Sense Media
Emily Oster - The Parent Data
Dr. Cara Goodwin - Parenting Translator
Parker, K., & Wang, W. (2015). Raising kids and running a household: How working parents share the load. Pew Research Center. Retrieved from https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2015/11/04/raising-kids-and-running-a-household-how-working-parents-share-the-load/